Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Jean gave me one of her library books to read, Up Island by Anne Rivers Siddons, an author I've not read. It's a difficult story for me because it involves an unfaithful husband. Naturally, when I took a nap break this afternoon, I dreamed about Don and Linda, one of those where I'm clawing eyeballs and pulling out hair. Siddons portrays the emotions of the betrayed wife so accurately, that it resonated deeply with me. Maybe that's why the dream was so graphic.

Tomorrow is the 20th anniversary of their wedding. I knew something had happened that night, even though I was in Jackson and nobody had told me. I came in from work that day, tired and depressed, lay down on the sofa and went to sleep. I dreamed that Don was in trouble, afraid, crying, wanting to see me, needing to talk to me.

When I awoke, I called my friend Sandy in Tupelo to see if Don was ok, explaining I'd just had a very distressing dream about him. Sandy started crying, and told me Don and Linda were getting married that night, and that he had not seemed very happy about it when she saw him the night before. My hope that he would come to his senses and that we would be reconciled was crushed. I cried myself dry that night, and called in sick to work the next day.

Divorce is hell. Twenty-two years later the feelings still make me ill. I never want to go through it again.

I just heard from Pam that we're going on Thursday to try Total Woman, formerly known as Fitness Lady. She and Jean went to check it out and liked what they saw. Our first swim in the saltwater pool is free to see if we like it. It's been two weeks without exercise, and I've gained back most of the weight I lost this summer already, very discouraging.

I did get a really nice compliment at the doctor's office yesterday. The woman who handled the paperwork took one look at my form, then looked at me, then started looking for something else. Finally, she came back to my form and asked, "Are you Mrs. Garrett?"

"Yes, I am," I replied.

"You are not 60 years old, I know!" she said very emphatically.

"Yes, I am. I'll be 61 in a couple of months."

"Girl, I thought I had the wrong form. You sure don't look 60!"

I giggled, then thanked her. I don't get to hear that very often, but I love it when I do.

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