Other blessings I'm thankful for today include Mike's continued recovery. His left eye is open a wee bit, but he could not count the number of fingers correctly when the nurse tested him. The drips have been removed, and he's been out of bed and walked (with assistance) to the restroom and around his room. His mental confusion lingers, part of the time he's tuned in perfectly to what is going on around him, then he's back in his own Twilight Zone - hallucinating, forgetting, repeating. He still claims to be feeling no pain. He continues to call me to say he's being discharged and that I need to come pick him up, so he's had no trouble remembering our telephone numbers. The nurses say he's nowhere near discharge.
.
I've requested a psychiatric evaluation, so we can assess the amount of cognitive damage that was done, and what coping skills need to be and can be developed other than drinking. Maybe his anxiety and depression will finally be addressed.
.
A couple of his doctors have suggested another stint at Methodist Rehab to deal with the brain injuries. I would love to leave this problem in his lap to deal with, but for now, he's not capable of making rational decisions. He is experiencing the consequences of his drinking, which is the first step in getting him headed in a different direction. I'm not sure he will remember much about spending Christmas 2008 in the hospital, so I'm not sure that these consequences mean much to him right now.
.
You will notice that I use the term "experiencing the consequences" rather than "suffering the consequences." Just the thought of anyone suffering anything triggers my co-dependency and I go into rescue mode, so I don't use that word when there is another way to describe what's happening. I am having minimal contact with him to protect myself and to give me room to deal with the anger I feel, but also to increase the effect of his self-imposed alienation and isolation.
.
My own coping skills include healthy and unhealthy behaviors, and I'm having to work very hard to stay on the healthy side of the fence. The unhealthy ones just lead to more pain, and my rational mind knows this, but my very needy, emotional self could so easily take me down the wrong path. Strong, healthy friends have appeared at every turn to help, so God's love and mercy have been abundant and apparent, and for that I am very thankful. Benji has agreed to stay through tonight before returning to Memphis, and Skip says he's coming tomorrow, if at all possible.
.
I cried yesterday for the first time in a long time while talking to my friend Sandra. She's been with me in this episode since Sunday night, coming down to the hospital and sitting with me for several hours, then following me home to make sure I made it safely. (I drove to the hospital with the "empty gas tank" chime dinging.) You are an angel, Sandra, and I thank you and love you. (And she's a Tupelo angel, which makes her super-special to me.)
.
Our Midnight Mass was magnificent with the music coming together as only God's grace can do it. The improvement that occurs between rehearsal and performance always amazes me. Mike's name got called twice last night in Prayers of the People:
.
For the aged and infirm, for the widowed and orphans, and for the sick and the suffering, let us pray to the Lord. (And then all the names on the prayer list are called.)
.
Lord, have mercy.
.
Then when we got down to "We give thanks, O Lord, for those celebrating birthdays and anniversaries," the names Mike and Cathy Garrett got called for December 26th. Lord, have mercy, indeed.
.
Benji and I enjoyed a late Christmas breakfast, Pip is still not interested in bacon, eggs, biscuits, etc, but he loves Pop-Tarts, and they are fortified with vitamins and nutrients. Later today, Benji and I will enjoy a quiet Christmas dinner at my favorite Chinese restaurant. They, the Cracker Barrel, and the C-Stores are the only things open today, well, maybe Waffle House, but I'd rather have Chinese.
.
Merry Christmas to all!
No comments:
Post a Comment