I had to laugh when I saw today's horoscope:

Sun is in Gemini, Moon is in Scorpio. Why does everything seem to be so difficult all of a sudden? It's because you've waited until the last minute again. Pray for a miracle.

Short of a fairy Godmother cleaning my house while I take a nap, I'm not in the market for miracles. What have I done to deserve one? Until I have done all I can do to help myself, the Good Lord is unlikely to waste a miracle on a lazy soul like me. Procrastination does tend to make housework pile up. I just spent two hours cleaning the kitchen and making it childproof before Pip returns. I was nervous while he was here thinking he might drop food on the dirty floor, then pick it up and put it in his mouth, as children often do. The closest thing I've had to a miracle is that he didn't. It gets spot cleaned occasionally with the "flip-flop mop," but that's about it.

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The vinyl tiles on that floor look dirty even when they're cleaned to Health Dept. standards. I'd love to replace it and the downstairs carpet with laminate hardwood, but that project has never worked its way very high on my list of priorities. There are so many other deferred maintenance projects around here that need attention. The miracle I'd most like to have is a handyman show up about once a week to help with things like the closet door that won't stay on the track, the light fixture that came unscrewed from the wall, the screen doors that need to be rehung, a new cover for the hot tub, the latch on the gate that won't stay latched, the fluorescent light fixture in the bathroom that needs to be replaced, etc. I have a long list. Women who have sons, brothers, nephews, or husbands to take care of things like this should thank their lucky stars. That will definitely be a prerequisite of Husband #4 if there is one.